Awakened Anesthetist

[PROCESS] Pom-Poms & Propofol: Defying Stereotypes in Anesthesia ft. Brooke Ferris, CAA

Mary Jeanne, Certified Anesthesiologist Assistant Season 5 Episode 77

What happens when you refuse to choose between two seemingly opposite dreams? Brooke Ferris, CAA knows firsthand. As both a Certified Anesthesiologist Assistant and a six-season veteran of the Atlanta Falcons cheerleading squad, she's lived in two worlds that many insisted couldn't coexist. Hear her story and be expanded in this Season 5 PROCESS premiere.

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SPEAKER_01:

I'm honored to introduce our season 5 flagship sponsor, Harmony Anesthesia Staffing, a locums company founded by CAAs and for CAAs. Like this podcast, Harmony is rooted in the belief that our work and our lives are most fulfilling when they align with our values. Harmony exists to help CAAs shape careers that truly support the life you want to live. A life by design, not default. Throughout season five, you'll get to know Harmony more deeply, their origin story, their growth, the CAAs behind the name, and what it's really like to work with them. I think you'll find their vision and mission resonate with the same themes we explore here on Awakened Anesthetist and in this process series. And knowing that, let's step into this expansive process episode. If you are a practicing CAA, current AA student, or someone who hopes to be one, I encourage you to stick around and experience the power of being in a community filled with voices who sound like yours, sharing experiences you never believed possible. I know you will find yourself here at the Awakened Anesthetist Podcast. Welcome in. Welcome back to season five of the Awakened Anesthetist Process Series, the place where certified anesthesiologist assistants come to expand what they believe is possible, not just in our careers, but in our lives. I'm your host, Mary Jean, and I'm so glad you're here for this very first process episode of the season. Today's guest is Brooke Ferris, a certified anesthesiologist assistant and a former Atlanta Falcons cheerleader. For six seasons, Brooke lived in the high-pressure world of the NFL, where strength, discipline, and performance were on constant display. And at the same time, she was navigating imposter syndrome as a first-year AA student during COVID, the intensity of AA training, and the weight of judgment from others who couldn't quite understand her path. You may have seen the recent cultural spotlight on the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders, but Brooke's story reveals the part we rarely get to witness. What it's like to pursue two seemingly opposite dreams at once, and the courage it takes to fully own your complexity. If you're in this CAA community and you feel like you don't quite fit the mold, or if you're juggling multiple passions, or if you're ready to stop squeezing yourself into other people's boxes, this episode will inspire you. Let's get into it. I'm really excited and congrats for um kicking off season five. This is, I'm kind of starstruck myself. I saw you years and years ago, and I was like, one day I'm gonna have her on the podcast.

SPEAKER_02:

And today's today. You're so sweet. I'm honored. Um, I'm excited to be here. I've never done a podcast before. Somehow, with all the other media stuff we've done with the Falcons, none of it was a podcast. So this is exciting for me.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, I'm so excited that our CAA community has the first crack at your podcasting. So wonderful. It's exciting. Um, I'd love to start with your upbringing, like what shaped you when you were a kid. I think us as CAAs all have such a unique background. Um, and I really like to highlight sort of youngbrook so we can kind of get a sense of your full journey as we get into more of your career as a CAA and as an Atlanta Falcons cheerleader.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, for sure. I've always been super driven, motivated, goal-oriented, all of that. Um, have great parents. And the thing is, is I never really put much thought when I was younger into like how I was going to do something. I just would get my mindset on things and just do it. And I'm still the same way to this day. Um, I think I've gotten myself in so many situations where I'm like, okay, well, I could have, I could have prepared better for this. I could have thought better about this, but I just go for it and then kind of see what happens. Um, a lot of times it works out. Um, there's some hiccups along the way, you know. But yeah, I don't know. I'll just I'll get my mind set on something and I'm like, we're gonna figure this out.

SPEAKER_01:

And was dance something early on that you wanted to do or your parents got you into? Or tell us how dance started for you.

SPEAKER_02:

So yeah, my mom put me in ballet when I was like two and a half, and then I just never stopped. Um, I did competitive dancing growing up all through high school. That was like my life. And then I did sideline cheer in high school as well. And then when I was a senior, I was kind of like super burnt out. I didn't know if I wanted to continue with it. And then I went to one Georgia game and I was like, yep, I want to be on the field. And then I danced at UGA. Um and then senior year, UGA, tried out for the Falcons, and then did the Falcons for six years.

SPEAKER_01:

Wow. And what did you think you were gonna do with dance? Like, you know, I I I have some experience in um like collegiate sports on a much, much lower level, but I knew there was no place to go. Like for me, I was playing division three basketball. I knew there was no, there was nothing after this. When did it first enter your mind that you wanted to do something extended past even high school or college?

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, so like when I was in elementary school, grade school, um, I wanted to dance professionally. I didn't really know what all came with that or much about it, but my parents really pushed me to try really hard in school as well and just kind of keep every door open. And I'm very grateful for that because uh, I mean, dancing my full-time job would be awesome and fun for so many reasons. Um, there can be a lot of money in it. It's really hard to make it to that level. And I didn't want to be living like paycheck to paycheck. Um, and so that's kind of why I decided to do something else. When I first started this whole process of um deciding I wanted to go into the medical field and all of that, I really didn't even know that I could cheer at the same time. But it was kind of one of those things, like I said before, I was like, I'm gonna do it. I don't know how it's gonna work, but I'm gonna try and do both. And I had so many people, so many people tell me I couldn't do it. Um, you can't go to Anastasia school and cheer in the NFL at the same time. You can't go to medical school and cheer in the NFL at the same time, you can't keep pursuing both. You have to choose one. I heard it all, but honestly, that fueled me so much more. Um, that's the type of person I am. If you tell me I can't do something, I'm gonna try that much harder to do it. Um so I don't want people to listen to this and think like, oh, it's the easiest thing in the world. It's a walk in the park. It was hard. It was really hard. I missed out on a lot of like life things. Um, you know, there were certain things I couldn't do on Saturdays because I had to get ready for the game on Sundays. You know, pretty much all my Sundays were taken up practice all the time. And when I wasn't practicing, when I was in anesthesia school, because I did I did three full football seasons in anesthesia school. Um, and so if I wasn't doing something with cheer, I was studying. Like that was it. And it was kind of even to the point where like I would be out to dinner with friends and I would just be sitting there like, I need to go home and study after this. Like there was a lot of parts of life that I feel like I didn't get to like fully enjoy because of everything that I was doing. Like being here now, it was definitely all worth it. But I don't I don't know that I would recommend someone to do both, honestly. I'm grateful for it, but it was it was a struggle for sure.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, I love that you're saying this because this is what I love to hear. Like, this is why I love podcasting, because um, when I was a CAA looking for people to show me what else was possible, or um, like, you know, even even people outside of the met of medicine or being a CAA, you know, you see the end product of like, wow, I can't believe you did this thing, but no one tells you what the middle looked like. And I'm like, I need to hear the middle because personally the middle felt really, really not so fun. And I'm like, is this normal? So I can't, I just I'm really excited to get in and share that messy middle part because it is such a wow what you were able to do. So let's back up a little bit because you mentioned that you were told that you can't go to medical school and be and cheer and be an Atlanta Falcons cheerleader. So at one point you were thinking I'm going to medical school and not a CAA. So tell me that whole path to finding out about being a CAA. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

So I would say since I was in like eighth grade, I knew I wanted to do something in healthcare. There was a while I wanted to be a surgeon. Um, and I actually went, my cousin was a surgeon and he had his own practice. So I think I was like 14 maybe, and we were at dinner, and he's like, Do you want to come to work with me tomorrow? I was, oh my gosh, I was so excited. I was like, What? There's no way. Like in the morning, like tomorrow. And he's like, Yeah, come on. And um, so I went to work with him the next day and was looking at like the anesthesia provider in the room, and I was like, What are they doing? Like that, that is cool. Like, what is that? And I swear it was that day, it was that easy that I was like, no, I want to do that. I want to do anesthesia. Um, and you know, a lot of anesthesia providers I feel like like to teach. Um, and that was no, well, maybe not all of them, but um, anesthesiologist was like showing me everything that she was doing and very into it, and I think that helped a lot too. And so then from there, I was between becoming an anesthesiologist and becoming a CRNA because I didn't know about our program. Um, and then the CRNA decision was really easy for me to make because UGA doesn't have a nursing school. So I was kind of to the point, I was like, okay, either I'm gonna finish this um science degree at UGA and go to medical school, or I need to like figure something else out because I knew I didn't want to be a nurse. Um and I was just like trying to figure out the next step. So skip to the part where I found out about the AA program. Met someone at a graduation party, and she told me about it. And I was like, there's no way that is real. How have I never heard of that? Um, and it was perfect for me because I was already gonna have the like advanced science uh undergrad degree. I had all the classes to go to med school. Um, and you actually need so many more of those classes, I feel like, for AA than like you would have for CR and I. So it was perfect because then I felt like it wasn't going to waste and all of that. And so I think there was like three extra classes I had to add my last semester. So I had to get special permission to take physics one and physics two at the same time. I also took biochem that semester. It was like all like all I took was sciences, and I swear that was the worst semester of school I've ever taken in my life. I can imagine. But like I was like, I'm gonna do this, and I just signed up for them and I was like, we're gonna figure it out. Would I recommend it? Probably not. Did it did it work? Yeah.

unknown:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Basically, once I found out about AA, I was like, yep, this is it, this is what we're doing, um, and just rolled with it. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

And you were dancing at UGA as well. I was, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

I was on the dance team at UGA. Um, we danced for the football games, which was one of the best things I've ever done in my life. Getting to travel to all the different college stadiums, and I cheered in several bowl games. I cheered in I think three SEC championships. I cheered at a national championship, the Rose Bowl. The Rose Bowl, oh my gosh, was insane. Uh, got to dance at the Rose Bowl parade. Wow. Oh my goodness. By the way, is five and a half miles, and we were like dancing the whole time. But what they don't tell me. Oh my gosh, I know, in boots with a little heel on them. And what they don't tell you is that you're not just going the whole time. It, you know, with the flow of it, it stops and it starts and it stops. So while it was five and a half miles, we were dancing in place for like half of that. So I swear we danced like 10 miles that day and then straight into the stadium to tear the whole game. So cool. Wow. But it was amazing. That's like one of my best memories from college for sure. That's amazing.

SPEAKER_01:

And you you were dancing in college, thinking you're gonna go to medical school, you found out about being a CAA and transitioned fairly um seamlessly, minus having to stack a bunch of classes together at the end there. And then when did you think, okay, I could be an Atlanta Falcons cheerleader, uh, you know, in this time frame right after college as well?

SPEAKER_02:

Ugh. So I think I was a junior when I started to get my heart set on that. There was a girl on my UGA dance team that went on to that step. And so I got to see her go through all of it, saw how much fun she was having and all that. And then in my head, I'm like, okay, well, if she can do it, maybe I can do it too. You know, it's never a guarantee that you're gonna make it. A lot of people honestly do not make an NFL cheer team their first year. It's something that people will try out for time and time again. One of my best friends did not make it until her eighth year.

SPEAKER_01:

Wow. Why? Why is that? It's just a whole different type of dance, or I feel like sometimes you're just not ready.

SPEAKER_02:

And I think she would she would tell you that. She would say, I wasn't meant to make the team until the year that I made it. Um, and I think the coaches know that they're not gonna throw you into a situation that you're not ready for where you're gonna be struggling all year with these 30-something other girls that are at like the top, top level. Um so they just wanted to get wanted her to get stronger in certain areas. She did it. She did, she was my rookie class. She did six seasons with me and she crushed it. So I I honestly I was very shocked that I made it my first year. Very grateful. Yeah. But yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Um I have a question. I'm gonna be I'm the one answering all of the like audience. Uh I don't know anything about dance except for I did my homework and watched DCC before this to like get any sort of balance. Why do you think you made it? Like, can we just be frank about why you think you made it your first year?

SPEAKER_02:

Like so, like I said, I started dance/tier when I was three. So I've been doing it my entire life. I think UGA properly prepared me for uh the audition process and being on a team and the professional aspect of it, um, and what to expect and all of that. But I also will say this something about so one thing about NFL cheerleading, every team is extremely different. Extremely different, different rules, different contracts, different practice times, like everything is different. Um, it's really kind of like a top-down thing. So I would say like some of it has to do with the owner. Um, a lot of it has to do with the coaches, like the CR department. There's so many things. What's that? What's CR? Uh community relations. Oh, okay. So that's like the appearances, the community stuff, uh being an ambassador of the organization, all of that. So I can speak for the Falcons organization in particular. They really, really, really look for well-rounded individuals. Um, they let that be known from day one. So it's not always like the most talented person or any of that. It's okay, well, she has this going on outside of cheer. Uh how are her interpersonal skills? How do we think she's gonna interact with fans? How do we think she's gonna interact with 30 other girls that are at this professional level? Every, you know, everyone on this team was the best at their respective university, was the best at this, was the best at that. So you put all these like super high performing individuals together, and you have to like be able to navigate that. Um, you might have been front and center every college routine, but now you're with 30 other girls that were front and center in theirs. So, you know, there's there's all kinds of different um things that play into it. So they really care about like you as a person and like, are you genuine? Um, do you have goals outside of this? So basically I showed up at my interview and I was like, I want to go to Anesthesia School at Emory.

SPEAKER_00:

And they were like, what?

SPEAKER_02:

Um, you know, Emory and the Atlanta Falcons organization have a huge partnership, um, which was very cool for me, I will say, throughout my tenure. Um, you know, the sideline doctors overlap with the doctors that I work with at Emory. There was a lot of like Emory events that happened that they would book the cheerleaders for. And so I think my coach would kind of intentionally put me on those like ribbon cutting ceremonies for opening new hospitals or surgery centers or anything like that. So it really did intertwine a lot, which was awesome. Um, but yeah, so when I said Anastasia School at Emory, they were like, okay, like we like this girl. We need to like look into her more and see if she even good, or you know, um, because you have to kind of get on their radar. So sure. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

I love this overlap between like if their uh perspective AA's listening, and um, I just actually listened to the very first episode of the other new uh CAA podcast, Lights Out, that the FAA put out. And um they were talking about just how the caliber of applicants has been raised so high that everyone has perfect scores, and just how do you make yourself stand out? And I love the message that you bring your whole whole self to it, which is also kind of the message of this whole episode as we get further into this, but that your one of your biggest strengths was that you didn't just do dance, like you were also this other person who had these other dreams and visions. Like I just I'm I love this, Brooke. Um, okay, so I am dying to know then what it felt like to realize you want to try out for the Atlanta Falcons cheerleading team. And this was in your junior year. Like, take us through that timeline, tell us about what it was like to be in school also at that time. Because these, you know, the end of your college career and auditioning were at the exact same time, which was what 2019-ish, 2018-ish?

SPEAKER_02:

2019. Okay, yes, and I actually have a good story that comes with this. So um, so yeah, I get I get my heart set on it. I'm like, I'm doing it, don't care what I have to do, we're gonna figure it all out. And with NFL cheerleading auditions, at least for the Falcons, actually, I think every team, I don't think this is unique. Um from when the audition process starts to when you finally found out if you make the team or not, that is months. It is months. Um, and I remember just feeling like I can't do this anymore. Like, almost like, do you guys want me or not? Because this is so hard to just keep doing this day after day. And like, uh, you know, you're eating super healthy, you're working out all the time, you're training like crazy, you're just in this mindset. But it is a lot to do to not even make the team. Like, if you make it, it's worth everything and more. But I just remember being like, oh my gosh, if I'm doing all of this and I don't even make it, I was gonna be so sad. But yeah, so basically it comes down to it. I make it all the way to final auditions. There's like several processes. There's like uh preliminary, semifinals, finals, and I make it to finals and find out that finals week, the whole last week of finals, is the week of my school finals for all of those science classes that I just told you I was trying to take in the same semester. So it was fine because a lot of my finals were in the morning and most of the final audition stuff was at night. So the very last final audition, like I'm talking like this was the last performance. This was like my performance in the center of the field with just one other girl in front of the huge panel of judges. This single performance was keeping me from that. Was the last step to find out if I made the team or not? The same time, like the same time to the minute as my organic chemistry lab final. And I was like, there's no way. And so, like, obviously, if you miss it on a filter audition, that's it. There's no, there's no way of getting around that. So I decided I was gonna go talk to my OCEM lab professor, which the classes, this is so funny because the classes at UTA are so big that like this man did not know me. Like he he didn't. So I show up to his office hours and I'm like nervous rambling. I'm like, hi, my name is Brooke. I'm in your Ochem uh class, and I actually decided that I wanted to try out to be an NFL cheerleader. I'm rambling. And he's just kind of like sitting there, like, where is this going? And so I like tell this whole story. And then I'm like, and basically I'm telling you all of this because I've made it this far, and my last audition is at 6 30, and so is our OCEM lab final. And like, is there anything that I can do? Like, can I take it like next week or something? And he's just sitting there and he's like really quiet. And I'm like, oh my gosh, he thinks I'm an idiot. And then finally he goes, Okay, I can tell how passionate you are about this. I can tell this is like a lifelong dream of yours. I do think this is a very rare circumstance, is what he said. And he was like, We're gonna figure this out. And I was like, Wow, okay. And so then I'm like, there's hope. There's hope. Um, and I was so excited, and I'm thinking he's gonna be like, Okay, you can take it like next week or something. And he goes, You can take it at the end of next semester when the other kids from the next semester take their final. And I'm like, in my head, I'm like, what? I'm supposed to remember all this stuff for a whole nother semester. But honestly, in the moment, I was just so happy to make both work that I was like, okay, thank you so much. Yeah, but then that was hanging over my head for the next however many months. Um yes. And that was your senior year.

SPEAKER_01:

That was your senior year, correct?

SPEAKER_02:

Yes. Okay. Yeah. Um, and then I went to the final auditions and then my life changed forever that night. We found out that night at probably like 10 p.m.

SPEAKER_01:

Hey Awaken Anessis community. I want to take a moment to tell you how our season five sponsor, Harmony Anesthesia Staffing, was started. You may have seen their name on social media or heard it come up in conversation with other CAAs, but what you might not know is that the idea for Harmony started in a really personal way. Harmony's CAA founder named Rad was working as an independent contractor when his life shifted. He needed more flexibility to be present as a parent and as a new entrepreneur, but what he found was that as an independent CAA, he had no real power to negotiate his contract to fit his personal needs. That frustration of being stuck in a model that doesn't value him as a clinician or as a whole person was something he knew many CAAs shared. So he set out to build something different. That's where the name Harmony comes in. The balance, connection, and alignment that so many of us are seeking between our careers and our lives. Harmony's goal isn't just to fill shifts, it's to humanize contracts and create anesthesia staffing solutions that actually respect the CAA behind the work. For those of us who want more than just a job, Harmony is about designing a career that truly supports the life you're building. If that resonates with you, I encourage you to schedule a free 15-minute consultation call with the Harmony team. It's a simple way to explore how they can support your goals and maybe even help you find more alignment in your own career. You'll find the link to schedule your free consultation in the show notes or on my website, awakenedanest.com.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I swear my life like changed so much after that day. I had only told my mom and my boyfriend at the time. So no one knew. My roommates, I had two roommates in college, they didn't know where I had been. Oh my god. So everyone was just like shocked, uh, excited, but shocked. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

And you were like, you had already got into anesthesia school at this point, correct? Had you known you were into a no. You had not known. No. Okay, so tell me at what point then you realized you were also gonna get into your other dream and you would be living these two dreams like side by side.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, so I made the team spring of 2019.

SPEAKER_01:

Your senior year of college.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes. I started the application process for Emory. I may have already started it, but I I definitely know it wasn't finalized at that point, and I definitely wasn't accepted. Um, and then oh, you know what? This is a good story too. So hopefully I don't make it too long. Um we love it. Amazing. Okay, so I remember my very first practice. I was a rookie. First practice, terrified, terrified. Um, things are no joke in the NFL. It's very cutthroat. It's you better know this, you better be on your A game, all of that. So I'm at my first practice. Okay, I gotta rewind. There was an issue with my transcript for anesthesia school, and it was getting very close to the date that the application like was supposed to be finalized and due. And me now would have handled this so differently than 22-year-old me did, but it's neither here nor there. Um I was just like being very patient with UGA, they hadn't sent my transcript over yet. I was kind of waiting and waiting and waiting, and then it gets to the week of, and I'm like, where is it? I had been on the phone with them, nothing was working, I had been emailing them. And so finally I get to the point I'm like, this is not gonna be in in time. And I was so sad because you know, I had done all of the other things, the the standardized tests and all the classes. I crammed them into that one semester, um, and my personal statement and all the things. And so this was like the one missing piece. So I ended up calling one of the professors from the program. I knew her because I had shadowed her before I applied for the program. And I called her. I'm like, have you ever heard of this happening before? Like, is there anything we can do about it? And she put me in touch with the director of admissions. And so I call her, I'm talking on the phone to her, and she's basically like, Yeah, like maybe this is happening for a reason. And I'm devastated. I'm I'm devastated. Wow, goodness. Um, and she's like, let me look at your application and see if there's anything I I think I need you to strengthen for next year. And I'm like, you know, I'm like devastated, but I'm trying to be like, okay, like this.

SPEAKER_01:

And this was like a clerical error. This was a clerical error that that you were trying to get to the bottom of.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, it was just the transcript thing, but I'm telling you, it was the week of, and that's why I said Brooke Nell would not have waited, but I was trying to be patient and I don't know. Anyways, um, so she's going through my transcript and she's reading and reading and reading, and she gets to the bottom where I have my extracurriculars, and she's like, Hold on, are you a are you a Cheerleader for the Atlanta Falcons. And I was like, yeah. And you know, I have been plus or minus whether I should put that on there at all. But it is such a big part of my life. Like, and there are more parts of it than just the cheerleading. My coach always says that. She's like, Yeah, the games are 10% of what you guys do. The other 90%, you're in the community, you're at the schools, you're at the retirement homes, you're um at the hospitals, you're at practice, you're just, you know, being an ambassador for the brand. And so I'm like, Yes, uh, I am a cheerleader for the Atlanta Falcons, but I didn't really know why she was asking. So I'm like nervous. And she's like, oh my gosh, you guys practice at the same studio like one day a week that I take dance lessons at. And I'm like, this lady in emotions. What? She's like, I'm gonna be there tomorrow. Are you? I'm like, yes. She's like, okay, like uh, I would love to meet you. Like, let's meet. And so I'm just excited to meet her. Yeah. So, like I said, first practice, rookie. We do this thing at the beginning of every practice that we call good news, bad news, sad news, glad news. And it's amazing. I love that we do that because people share just all the things going on in their life, and it's a really good way to just kind of know like where people are at and all of that. So, but rookie, like I was not planning to speak at the first one as a rookie. But I needed to talk to this lady, and I knew that she was in the other room. So we're at the beginning of practice, and I nervously raise my hand as a rookie, and I'm like, no one knows me. I'm like, hi, um, I know you guys don't know me, but um, I have this dream and I really want to go to Emery's Anesthesia program, and I tell them I tell them everything. I'm like rambling. I'm like, there's a problem with my transcript, and the director of admissions somehow like takes dance classes here, and she's in the other room right now, and she wants to talk to me. I expect these girls to be like, what is this girl talking about? Like, is she asking to leave practice right now? Like, but no, they're like, oh my gosh, what are the odds? Like everyone's like screaming, like freaking out. They're like, you have to go, you have to go. And my coach is like, you can learn the choreography later. You need to go talk to her. Like, let me know when it's like the perfect time. We're gonna let you leave and you're gonna come back. We're gonna figure it out. I'm like, okay. And she looks at my captain, she's like, you make sure that she goes out there and she talks to her. So, like 20 minutes pass, and they call me over and they're like, You put a shirt on, because you know we practice in like sports bras. They're like, You put a shirt on and you go over there and you talk to her. So I leave, and once again, I like start rambling at her. I'm like, I'm so honored to meet you. Like, I've heard so much about you. This is my dream program. Like, I can't even picture myself doing anything else, and I'm just like rambling, rambling, rambling. And she's so sweet. Um, she's kind of like, I'm so sorry about your transcript. Um, but like you really seem like you have the heart, and like I just I don't want you to stop trying and all this stuff. So this was a Thursday. The next day was Friday, the deadline of the application. And I get an email the next day, and then they called me for an interview, I guess a couple months later. Um, interviewed, and they actually called me on the way home from my interview and accepted. Oh my gosh. Yeah, I was shocked.

SPEAKER_01:

So Brooke, this story has so many twists and turns because I'm just getting ready to ask you that you know, it per your timeline, you start anesthesia school as well as is it your second season with the Atlanta Falcons? Because you had been cheering while you were still in undergrad, right? Or like kind of between undergrad before anesthesia school, and then COVID hits. So not only are you starting Emery's AA program admits the very beginning of COVID, but you're also cheering now in the NFL amidst the very beginning of COVID. Okay, so please tell us what the hell was going through your mind. What was going on?

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, COVID turned my life upside down, truly. So my sister lives in Hawaii. Um, she came home. I went back to my parents, my brother went back to my parents. So all five of us were in the same house for the first time since I was in high school. Um, and like I'll be honest in saying my family is all we're all kind of just doing stuff all the time. It forced us to slow down. And I think that we will always be grateful for that time. This is just to say one nice thing about COVID. Um I think that I think that you know, we watched movies, we played games, we really enjoyed that time together. Um, everything else about COVID, obviously, COVID COVID was beyond devastating for so many reasons. It was horrible for so many reasons. Um and mine are are nowhere near some of the things that that people went through. So I don't say this in that way at all. Um for me, my schooling was delayed by I think three months. You're gonna see the program.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, we started.

SPEAKER_02:

We started virtually. Um that was interesting. You know, we had the name of the COVID class because we we were on Zoom school and I was cheering to an empty stadium. I think the only people in the stadium were the players, the coaches, the doctors and medical trainers, us, and then like us and the players' parents. Um I have a question.

SPEAKER_01:

It was a question from the peanut gallery. Um, I was not watching football during this time. Were the games still recorded? So you like had to pretend like it was a real I mean it was a real game, but you had to pretend like it was a full stadium, but there was no one there.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, there were they were real games, they were televised. We were getting COVID tested like crazy. I do remember that. Um yeah, and it's so funny because you don't realize like how much of the noise in the stadium is just from all the fans like chatting. It was dead silent in that stadium. Dead silent. Like we can always hear like the hits, like when the players hit each other because we're right there. But this was like these players getting trucked in this empty stadium. It just was so loud. That's what I remember.

SPEAKER_01:

And I remember it being so silent. And that was a full season, like a full season of the NFL was to an empty stadium. And your full year of AA school, how how did the transition into clinicals go?

SPEAKER_02:

Oh yeah, so my first whole first semester was virtual. Um, they did bring us in like one or two at a time for like SimLab type stuff, learning how to do IVs, um, you know, more the hands-on kind of stuff. Um, and then we started clinical the next semester. It's funny, I really thought like we were gonna be considered a really weak class, but we were actually just talking about this last Friday. And our class is actually considered a really strong class. I don't know if we just had to try that much harder or what it was, but we came out with a really strong class. Um, so it, I mean, it all worked out fine. It was definitely a lot of uncertainty with both of my school and my job at the time, um, for sure, but it all worked out.

SPEAKER_01:

Girl, oh my goodness. So you went your entire program, um, your entire AA program as an Atlanta Falcons cheerleader, correct? And then you graduated AA school win in like 2022-ish?

SPEAKER_02:

December of 2022, yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay. And then got your first job and continued uh your Atlanta Falcons career for two more years, was it?

SPEAKER_03:

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay.

SPEAKER_02:

So I did I did two years actually working. Um both of those years were harder for different reasons. My first year was hard because I work at uh Emory and we do super, super big surgeries, super, super sick patients. And so there was that learning hump that I was trying to get over of being by myself, doing all these big scary cases with all these um patients that are just so sick. So I think that was hard to juggle. And then my second year, I definitely had the hang of things uh for the most part at my hospital job, but I was a captain for the Falcons. So then that year was hard because I was navigating being a captain. I loved being a captain. Um, I loved being there for the girls, but it was it was challenging. I'll say that.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah. I can imagine anything else.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm interested, like when people, you know, I'm thinking what AA school was like for me, you're meeting so many different people, all these different preceptors, you're going to different hospitals. Every time people are finding out that you are an Atlanta Falcons cheerleader, I assume, or like word comes before you. How do you navigate that?

SPEAKER_02:

My gosh, yes. I when I first started clinical, it was it was really tough. People definitely knew about me before they met me, and that was hard. I think people were like, who is this girl coming in, thinking she can do both? She's an NFL cheerleader, she can't be smart, she can't be for real, she can't be serious, she can't be nice. Um, and I felt it in the moment, but then it was like really like later on when people would kind of make comments to me, I'd be like, Okay, yeah. So everything I was feeling was correct. People would say things like what?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Like, oh, you're you're actually uh you actually are so nice, or oh my gosh, wait, you're actually so smart, or wow, you take this very seriously, stuff like that. That they didn't mean anything by it. They actually meant it as a compliment in the moment, but I knew that that meant meant that they assumed that I was gonna come in and like um basically I just had to try really, really, really hard my first couple semesters. It did eventually get to a point where people knew about me enough to know, okay, like this girl's nice, she's not evil, uh, she knows what she's doing. You know, the anesthesia community is so small. So we're word travels, but at first, oh my gosh, I was having to try just as hard with my like people skills as I was with my clinical skills just to prove that I deserve to be there. Um and you know, I took all the same tests as you guys, I took the same classes as you guys.

SPEAKER_01:

And what worked? I would love to hear. I'm hearing people in the audience are who are listening saying, like, okay, yeah, I kind of feel that too. What were those people's skills? What worked to prove yourself?

SPEAKER_02:

Um, like clinically, I had to be that much more prepared. Um, you know, I would sit up after practice, I would sit up looking up the patients for the next day, taking notes, deep diving in the chart, deep diving on the procedures that we were doing, and then just being overly understanding, overly kind, overly open-minded, overly just just everything. Um, you know, checking your your tone, every single thing that that comes out of your mouth. And I I do think that's something that the Falcons has taught me in general. You know, it's almost like I have a big, big Falcon on my on my forehead. I represent them in everything that I do. You know, I guarantee you, if I cause some problem somewhere, my coach or the higher-ups of the Falcons organization would know about it that day. Um like things just you're kind of under a microscope sometimes. Um and I think that it's it's good in a in a lot of ways. It's um impacted the way that I handle situations and and stuff like that. Um, but there's not a lot of room for error or having a bad day or mistreating someone. Not that I would do that anyways, but sure. You know what I mean? Being human, yeah, not being perfect. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Wow. I'm my brain has like 27 follow-up questions on how you're acclimating now that that pressure is possibly a little relieved now that you're retired.

SPEAKER_02:

Swear that could almost be like a part two because I am just starting to like navigate all of that. I've really only been retired from cheer for like two, almost three months now. It's turned my life upside down. Um to retire.

SPEAKER_00:

Yes. Sure, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. Um, I've spent a lot of time talking about this the past two weeks in general because I think it started off and I was so like I would just be with my family or my friends doing something fun, and I would just look around and be like, guys, I would never be able to be here right now if I was still cheering, like because I would have practice or a game or something. And that was fun. And I was like, oh my gosh, this is so fun. Like I told my friends, I'm like, this is the most summer summer I've ever had because usually summer when you're an athlete is extra practice and training, extra training. You're getting ready for football season, this and that. Um, and so this was the first summer that I had where I was like, okay, like I could, I could go to the beach, I can do this, I can go to a little cookout at the last minute. Um this past week was the first week that I would like wake up in the morning, I would not even know where to begin my day. Um I realized for people that haven't been through something like this, this all sounds very dramatic, but my schedule was completely turned upside down in like a day. Um, because I was still doing stuff with the Falcons up until like the day I retired, pretty much. I was still doing community appearances and helping with auditions and stuff like that. So now on my off days, I wake up and I'm like, okay, I should get out of bed, but I don't really have to.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

I should do this, but no one's really telling me to. No one's telling me to work out anymore. No one, it's just, it's so different. Um, and I have now learned that I just need more stuff. So I'm starting some other things. Um, I just started personal training yesterday. Uh, someone's training me, not me training other people. Okay. Um, I'm learning how to cook. I've never had time to learn how to cook. So I'm learning how to cook. Um, I'm gonna start playing golf. I'm trying to become fluent in Spanish, so I've been on Duolingo every single day. Yeah. Um, but I just needed something to like fill that void. It just took me a minute to like figure that out. Um but yeah, it's it's been a huge adjustment. And you know, I've obviously spent a lot of time talking to my teammates that have retired. And I've also spent, I have a lot of uh friends that have retired, uh football players that have retired from the NFL. And they have just made me really realize how lucky I am to have this other job because in their case, NFL players don't have other jobs like the cheerleaders do. So they retire and they're done. A lot of them have these like full-blown identity crises. A lot of them go through like severe mental health. No one talks about this. Severe mental health battles when they retire. Um, I think it happens in the cheer world too, but maybe not to as much of an extreme because we all have something to fall back on. So they've made me really realize like I have a whole other job, and that is so powerful. Um, and it's a job that I care about and I'm passionate about, um, and all of that. So I feel very lucky in that sense. Um, but yeah, we're just we're navigating it as we go. Um, oh, and something else exciting. My next step, I have always wanted to teach in the AA school programs. And they've known that. Like I went through school being like, I want to do this, I want to be, I wanna do what you guys are doing, I wanna like teach people just how y'all taught me because I was so pleasantly surprised like how much the professors cared and like poured into us and how human they were, and just like amazing and understanding. Um, and so they they knew that. And so they had a position open up um, I guess a couple months ago, and I interviewed for it and I got it. So I know what position, what position? So I'm gonna be like, I don't even know what the official title is, but basically I'm gonna be a professor through the school of medicine um in the anesthesia program, and I'm gonna be doing simlab. Gotcha for for like the the baby babies, like the just starting out the first semesters, which is exactly where I want it to be. Exactly where I want it to be. So um I'm super excited for that. I think that's gonna give me something to be passionate about, you know, to help fill that cheer void a little bit. I'm filling it with like five different things, but um, you know, I was doing it for so many hours a week that it takes that many things to replace it. Um, so yeah, I'm very excited about that.

SPEAKER_01:

I'll be uh Congratulations. That's awesome. You're gonna be amazing. And I just I'm excited for the first years to meet you and be like held by your energy and just your passion and leadership. I mean, so much leadership in your story. It's just I'm proud to call you a CAA colleague. Um you're welcome. It totally deserved. Uh I would love to hear. We've heard a lot about how um cheering and dancing impacted being a CAA. Can you shed light on the reverse? Like, how did anesthesia or like what did your anesthesia community feel like in support of being a cheerleader? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh my gosh. I so I guess I've kind of touched on this a little bit, but I really thought that I was gonna come in and kind of just keep my head down for the entirety of my anesthesia schooling, possibly even after, um, just because of what, you know, the the medical field in general can kind of be like a doggy dog world. Um and, you know, you hear about people talking down to the trainees and and all that. Um I was fully prepared to come in and just be low-key, blend in. To my surprise, once they knew me, the anesthesia community fully embraced everything that came with me and cheering. And I will be forever grateful for that. I'm talking, they had anesthesia tailgates before the games, they were all there with signs, they had tattoos that they made of my face. People have them on their face, on their arms. Oh, that's awesome. Um my boss works with my schedule, with my cheer schedule, which I'm forever grateful for. I mean, so supportive. Just you name it. They they did it. It was amazing. And my last game, that was like one of the most special days of my entire life. People knew I was dreading it uh for years, and they were all over the stadium that day, that last game, and I could see them. And I it was the the fourth quarter, um, my last quarter ever. And my mom was right in front of me. I will never forget that. And a whole bunch of anesthesia people were in a section right in front of me, and I had turned around, I had just gotten to because we rotate each corner, each quarter. So I ended intentionally, I ended in that corner because I knew that they were all gonna be there, and um, that's where I wanted to be. And I turn around and I look back up, and there is this massive, I'm talking like 10-foot banner that they had hung down over the ledge that said, last game, best game, we love you so much, or something like that. And I will never forget that. Um that's like a core memory for me for sure. Just how everyone rallied around me that day. Um, some people came to the locker room or like outside the locker room um with flowers and uh that kind of thing. Um, and then afterwards they had a retirement party, um, which was crazy. It was at this uh little restaurant bar kind of by my house. Um, and I'm talking like my professors were there, my colleagues were there, their kids were there, every like everyone who had had an impact on my journey throughout everything was there. People that don't go outside the house were there. It was crazy. Um and the T Recluses literally. Um, and I just like I was so happy and so overjoyed by everyone being there and all that that I like wasn't even sad on my last game. I I was a little sad, but like mostly I remember my last game in that whole day as being so happy. Um because they just rallied around me in such a way that I just like there wasn't even room to be sad. Um so yeah, that was amazing. I will I just did not think it was gonna be like that. I thought they were gonna be like, who is this NFL cheerleader and what is she doing in the operating room? Like, yes, that doesn't go together, but it was the complete opposite, and I'm so grateful for that.

SPEAKER_01:

Ugh, so how awesome. How awesome. I just it really the NFL, and would you agree with this that the NFL culture and community of like dog eat dog, because you had said that as well, like it's really high pressure, have to be perfect, and medicine seem sort of related. I mean, does that feel did they feel similar in terms of the perfection that's demanded and the strikes for sure?

SPEAKER_02:

Uh definitely something about both of them. There is no room for error, like um, it's not really tolerated on the NFL level. My coach always says, stay ready so that you don't have to get ready. Um, and she could press play, she calls it pressing play at practice. She could press play on a dance we haven't done in four months, but it better be perfect when you when she presses play. Like that's just how the NFL world is, as it should be. It's the highest level that you can get to. Um and then obviously there's no room for air in the operating room either. Um, you know, that's life or death type stuff. So yeah, um, I do think sometimes um I was I was very hard on myself being a captain uh the past year. Um I think sometimes I would get to practice and you know, I tried not to share what had gone on. We say leave it at the door, like whatever you're you're dealing with, like this should be your your your fun safe space where you can just dance and express yourself and and um so I tried to leave it all at the door. Um, you know, whether I had had a a case that didn't go well or a patient death or something like that, I tried to leave it at the door. Um, but honestly, the days when I did work and then go to practice were a lot. Um and there were some days that I just wanted to be like, you guys don't even know what I just what I just dealt with. Like, you know, days I would struggle teaching choreography or just stuff like that. Like, but I like I said, I tried to like leave all that out of it um and not really bring it up. But I do know that that that did impact um some of my time as a captain.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, but um I mean you're you're touching on a paradox that I really like to explore, which is how do you have both? You the need for um maybe not perfection, but the the to not make mistakes, because in medicine mistakes can kill people. And in the NFL, mistakes cost I'm assuming it's a millions and millions of dollars, is maybe why the perfection is so needed. But um how do you then also be a human in those environments? Because humans make mistakes. We are not robots, we have to rest. We there has to be a certain level of like um taking care of ourselves in order to be able to perform at that high level. Like pushing, pushing, pushing is not going to be able to sustain long term, which it sounds like you would agree with that, like, okay, I did that for six years, you're a cheerleader for six years for the Atlanta Falcons, and it pushed me to my limits that now I'm not even it's hard for me to reintegrate back into normal society.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, and I think that's part of this like identity, whatever I was kind of going through last week. I was for six years, I was always on. I was always on, whether I was at practice, whether I was at a game, whether I was in the community, whether I was at work, I was always on and I was always doing something. And that has been a huge part of this adjustment. Like my uh my friends have been like, you know, it is okay to like sit on the couch. And I'm like, why would I sit on the couch? And they're like, because you you need to like relax. I'm like, yeah, huh? Um do not confuse. I don't I don't do well with that. Yeah. Um, yeah. I think it will get easier. I do think like I am someone that does better when I'm busy, but I do think in general, maybe the uh not always having to be doing something will get easier. Um but yeah, I do think that that's that's part of why this whole transition has been so difficult. Sure. Um, sure.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah. But yeah. I mean, I think people who are just getting out of AA school could even relate to that without having the Falcons experience on top of that. Like AA school demands that you're on this rigorous schedule, that you've, you know, you've compartmentalized your life so that you can do this really, really hard thing. And then you get out, and you know, people have that like, oh boy, what do I do now? Um experience. So I think that's very real and normal for um CAAs to feel. And then it's kind of like, okay, what do I do with that next step? And knowing that you don't have to have all the answers, you don't have to figure this out, you don't have to be super comfortable sitting around for an hour on your couch, but knowing that, like, hey, I know I can't push myself at that level forever and always. Eventually, I have to get more comfortable, you know, maybe going from rest to rest and stress, rest and stress. Like that's what our bodies are meant to do. Um, yeah. Yeah. I mean, I could, we could go again, we have like seven episodes within this one episode, but I do want to, I know your story is just so interesting. Um and I'm just grateful for you being here because I just love being able to find these CAA stories and expand our community. Like, I know you think it's not possible to do this dream with being a CAA, but it really, really is. And it's oftentimes a matter of what are you willing to sacrifice? You know, you said you missed a bunch of your early 20s, and you know, um, I'm sure before that with dance that you just were not living a normal teenage life either. Um, and I just think it's a reality check to say, yes, sure, anything is possible, but you can't it everything has sacrifices, you know. So I just love that part of your story. Um, okay, so I have a couple more questions to um before we wrap up. And I'm just wondering what parts of being an Atlanta Falcons cheerleader will you hold forever and always in the operating room?

SPEAKER_02:

Ooh, I would say like the interpersonal communication skills. Um, I think that is a huge part of being an NFL cheerleader because you are representing the brand. Um, and you honestly, you're just put in so many interesting situations. Like fans will ask you crazy questions, like questions that we can't answer. Like, and you have to like divert though with a smile on your face, and I guess like it's not weird. Like, yeah, um that for sure. Um I have had talks with some anesthesiologists before, and we always feel like having been some type of athlete before makes a really solid anesthetist.

SPEAKER_00:

Um I see that too.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I don't know if it's from you know the discipline or being used to being on a team, the work ethic or or what, but I see a lot of uh parallels between that. And on top of that, I think that like everyone at my job knows that I cheer or cheered now. And I I mean I walk around with this smile all the time. Like I'm just like singular, like, hi, what's up? I'm dancing all the time. Um people would definitely say that. I'll be doing boots on the ground. You know that line dance? Uh no. You you got that. But I would love to have said I'll teach you. I'll teach you. I'll be doing that in pre-op. I'll be day. I'm I'm always dancing. I'm always moving. I'm always that. Um and people will call me like a cheerleader at work, meaning in like a morale-boosting way. Yes. But I'm I'm happy to be that person. I think especially at Emory, um, the cases can be so sad. Um some days you're seeing multiple sad things back to back to back to back. So I'm happy to be hopefully what people consider like positive a positive uh person or like a light in what can feel like darkness sometimes. Yeah. Um, so I think that's that's a parallel for sure.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, last question, because I I know that there are CAAs who are practicing listening, being like, okay, I have this thing that I want to do, but yet like I want to have a kid, or I want to paint and and make art, or I want to start a business. And there are perspectives listening who are like, gee, how do I pick just one career for the rest of my life? Is it a is it being a CAA? I know people are wanting to find that perfect place to live their whole life. And I'm just wondering, as a CAA, what you would say about this profession allowing you to be all of yourself if you feel like it supports that well, or you know, gee, are you kind of locked, lucked into something that allows you to do both? Or like what your thoughts are on living a life uniquely meant for you as a CAA?

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, for sure. For starters, I would say that being in anesthesia school and actually being a practicing anesthetist are are different things. Um, I think like a parallel between cheer and being in anesthesia school is that you're never really done. There's always something that you could study. There's always something I could be doing for cheer all the time. Something I could be getting better at, uh, planning something for my line, something there's always something in both of those that I think you could always be doing. The blessing with this job when you're actually practicing is most of the time I don't take it home with me. When I leave work, the patient is out of my care. I've done everything in my power to do what's best for them during that surgery and waking them up and all of that. Um, and there's nothing else that I can do now. They're they're out of my care, they're in someone else's care, they're in the ICU or wherever. Um, and so I think that once you're actually working, there's a lot of room for your other passions, whether it be starting a family, starting a little side hustle. You know, there's tons of people in anesthesia with with side hustles. And I think you find that the the community, anesthesia is a really interesting group of people. There's I feel like there's not a lot of bad egos in it. Everyone tends to like support each other, and like so I think absolutely when you're practicing, there's uh so much room to to do what you want to do. Um, and on top of that, I say, and I say this about everything, if you can't listen to people if they tell you not to do something, clearly, because I would never be in either of these careers if I would have listened to people. Um, I would maybe be in one, um, but I'm not even so sure that one would have necessarily happened without the other because in this weird roundabout way, they kind of built on each other and it all worked out the way that it was supposed to. And people close to me know that I say this all the time. It always works out. It always works out. Even if you think that it's not going to, it does. And it wasn't meant to be the way that you wanted it to work out for whatever reason. Um, I think my mom hates this about me because I am like so go with the flow on way too many things, um, which I kind of touched on earlier. I all go into things with no game plan and just be like, we're gonna figure this out. But if you think about all the things in your life that you stressed about, you were up worried about, and then they ended up working out anyways, you know, it's crazy to look back and be like, why did I worry about that at all? It all worked out exactly the way that it was supposed to. So I would say just follow your heart. I feel like I'm I'm preaching.

SPEAKER_00:

I would say just I'm taking it.

SPEAKER_02:

Just just follow your heart. Um, and even if you don't know the exact route, just jump into it and figure it out as you go. Because you're if you don't start, you can never finish, you know. So that's that's what I would say.

SPEAKER_01:

I love it to end on. I love it to end on. Amazing. Well, thank you so much, Brooke. I am so excited to continue watching your journey. I found you on Instagram, so hopefully you continue to post there. But yes, I was like, who is this girl? Show me more of this girl who's a CAA. Awesome, Brooke. Well, I'm excited to continue watching your journey and best of luck on your new ventures. Yeah, and just thanks for being here. Yeah, you were so awesome. Thank you for everything, and I really enjoyed talking to you. Awesome. Thanks for listening to Awakened Anesthetist. If this episode resonated with you, share it with a CAA friend, an AA student in your life, or a perspective, and let them know why you loved it. It's the most important thing you can do to support this podcast and its mission. You can always find more ways to connect with me and this CAA community at awakenedanesthetist.com, including an invitation to join season five Mindful Connections. These are free virtual gatherings open to anyone in our awakened anesthetist community. And while you're scrolling the website, check out my trusted CAA partners who make this podcast possible with a special thank you to my season five sponsor, Harmony Anesthesia Staffing. Talk soon.

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